SPORTS PAGES

Dead Guys handle Cocks easily

It was a bad night for Diksburg even before the game started. NAF scrutiny caused elite defensive
back Rooster Cockburn to be suspended for alleged use of a poison knife in last weeks match against
the Sewer Urchins.  Starting catcher Peter Smalls also missed the match performing community service
in the Diksburg militia. 

Things frankly went south from there.  A series of injuries caused more Cocks to pull out allowing
an easy night for the Pet Cemetary. The Cocks flacid performance two weeks in a row has caused a
massive desertion among their fans. This trend may reverse however as Diksburg has announced that
they are calling up charismatic and popular thrower Miles Long up from the minor circuit.