Chefs come up short

Kyusan Shireman -- lead commentator, in ""s
Bleeby Ota -- color commentator, in ''s

Blutto Ota -- roving reporter, in **s

"A 1-2 overtime loss.  Would you call this one a disappointment, Bleeby?"

'I wouldn't, unlike most of the fans.  The Chefs seemed to have a knack of beating the green-

skinned teams, defeating the Manglers twice and the Gorthgoth team once before.  Some of the Chef 
faithful figured they had this one in the bag.'

"But they didn't figure in the Greenskin wizard, did they?"

'No they didn't.  After a grueling opening drive that consumed the entire half, the ever-popular 
Gimli Koumei finally broke free of his defender and was wide open in the end zone.  Alas, it was 
not to be, because just as the mysteriously-named, uh...'Stomach of Density'... picked up the ball 

and cocked his arm back to throw:  *Pow*  Lightning bolt, right in the kisser.'

"The Chefs own wizard-in-the-kitchen, Gastromeister Takeshi, was having a rough day, barely getting 

the Orc's attention with his first half avacodo stew, and being all but ignored with his spinach 
salad in the second."



*I asked Takeshi why he chose two vegetable dishes to tempt the obviously carnivorous Orcs.  

Although Takeshi refused to answer, one of the players noted that the Master Chef had a theory 
about the Orc's weakness being green food.  Because all the green meats had been taken by the 
stadium vendors, Takeshi's only recourse were the plants.*

"A rare lapse from one of the biggest names and waistbands in cooking."

'The Orcs scored quickly in the second half, the Chef kicker putting the ball nicely out of bounds 

for the touchback.'

"They managed to redeem themselves by putting together what coach Chugwine calls 'The Wooden 

Cage'.  Simplistic, but the ball carrier made it all the way, untouched, in only three turns."

"So it was OT.  The Orcs won the toss for the second time, but chose to receive rather than kick 
this time.  What were they thinking?"

'They must have known that halflings can't kick, because this was another bad one, right out of 

bounds for the touchback.'

"The Chefs didn't give up though, holding the Orcs tough through six turns of hard-hitting action, 

almost pulling off one the most amazing defensive plays I've ever seen."

'I'm still in shock.  The Gorgoth blitzer is running, uncontested toward victory.  Nobody anywhere 

near him, Deeproot and Ironwood Axeblight both on their backs.  A totally hopeless situation.'

"Until you consider the star power of the big guy.  But it starts with a little guy, Millicent 
Mako, the newest member of the Chefs:  dodging left, dodging right, to help Deeproot to his feet."

'DS gets up, blinks his eyes, and spots the distant Blitzer.'

"Then unleashes a roar and, much to the amazement of the young Mako, picks up the stuggling halfing 

to throw him down the field!  While in three tackle zones, no less!"

'An incredible pass.  Millicent soars through the air like an overweight shrieking football, 

beaning the blitzer square in the head!'

"And in another stroke of luck for the Chefs, the ball bounces out of bounds."

'Those who left the stadium early clearly missed a legendary play by this aging star.  How old is 
he now?  950 years?  And he's not even thinking about retirement.'

"A rare moment of hope and glory for the Chefs."

'Until some slab-brained fan threw the ball right back in the Orc's laps.'

"Once the ball was picked up, the TD was guaranteed.  The Gorgoth Greenskins advance, while the 

surviving members of Chefs head home with nothing but injuries and memories"

'Indeed.  The Cabalvision wizard who witnessed that even will be asked to recall it again and again 

on the clairvoyant highlight channel.  I don't know about you, Kyusan, but I'm tuning in.  I still 

can't believe it.'

"Only in the Moot, Bleeby, only in the Moot."